Cancer

(This poem is a collaboration with Sandra Lopez Lambert.)

the day that I was diagnosed
I feared for those I loved the most
how would they live on?
how long could I be strong?

what will happen to my boy?
who will buy for him a toy?
after I am gone
who'll play with him upon the lawn?

it's so unfair, it's so unfair
it's not me without my hair
and then some days I just don't care
and helplessness surrounds me

I'm at the end, I'm at the end
I need to know that we'll transcend
hate and greed and war
and my children will live forever more

I used to be a big sensation
filled with righteous indignation
now I'm a guy who's going to die
and I'm all about forgiveness

I go back and forth 'tween pain and hope
and the foggy mind that comes from dope
but I know I have more life to live
more laughs to laugh, more love to give

In the time I have I want to be
like a sailor who, once lost at sea,
found his way home to friendly faces
and gained his welcome in many places

and although it must come down to this
the birthdays and the weddings that I'll miss
don't cry for me when I am gone
love and laugh and carry on